My much anticipated post today will NOT be about Valentine's Day. It will, however, be about the hallways of UEHS. IT IS REALLY NOT THAT HARD TO WALK AND TALK PEOPLE. It's called multi tasking if you can't do it now things aren't looking good for you. What do you think is the main thing they look for in McDonald's drive thru staff? Good looks?
FALSE. They look for excellent multi tasking skills. These people have to take orders AND look at a screen to see how much money to give back to ANOTHER customer. Point number one: If you can't walk and talk you're not worthy of minimum wage. SECONDLY, stay on your side of the hallway, fool. You might have seen a road before? Yes, there are TWO SIDES. And people stay on their side of the road. If they don't they get a ticket from Johnny Law. Which brings me to my next point: Hallway Safety Monitors. The HSEA (Hallway Safety Enforcement Agency) is a key component to a brighter tomorrow.
I propose that there is an HSM(Hallway Safety Monitor) on every corridor, to maintain the order that should come NATURALLY. One violation counts as a warning.
The next offense will not be taken so lightly. With a second infraction comes HSEA brutality. HSM agents will carry mace at all times to deal with repeat offenders and or anyone who exhibits disobligingness. A third instance where the rules are blatantly disregarded, and there can be only one solution:
capital punishment. All those who violate the Law of the Hallway THREE times are declared unfit to live, and dealt with immediately. The Law of the Hallway (2007 edition) will be available in all vending machines, and will be
required reading for every student.
Just kidding?! But really, MAINTAIN THE ORDER.
p.s. I'm not a communist, I swear.